Encounters

are never accidently

Trust your feelings

"I do not know what it means that I'm so sad. A fairy tale from the old days, that does leave my head..."

This morning I woke up at five o'clock. I had to briefly look around to see where I was. Something I had dreamed, which had given me quite a long way away. But I could not remember it anymore.

In any case, a deep sadness rose from nothing and paved the way for me. I cried, sobbed, and did not resist the crashing streams that shot out of my eyes. I was just wondering a bit. After a while, the tears dried up and I felt somewhat relieved. Started the coffee machine, sat down at my desk, sipped my coffee, smoked a cigarette.

"What was that? I am very happy at the moment. Did this happen to me because of my conversation with my friend KrishnaMa last night? "

Actually, she had just come down, so that we could look after the accreditation for this year's Reeperbahnfestival. However, as with the two of us, this is almost always the case, we quickly went deeply into themes that move us at mthe moment. So we talked about this and that and remained attached to interpersonal relations and encounters.

The trigger: I had two days before "accidentally" met a man who had walked me three years ago over the road and directly into my heart. At that time I felt a very deep connection, which animated and inspired me. Unfortunately, we were not made for a relationship and our paths separated a few months later. It took me a long time to let him go.

How often in life does it happen that you meet someone who really touches you deeply and keeps its place in your heart for a long time, sometimes forever? I think those people are counting on one - maybe two hands - at the end of the day. And, of course, it is all the more difficult to let them go. Sometimes tragedy can not be put into words.

Because the connection that you feel at the soul level is the same as it feels. It is indeed deep and unique. You can and must rely on this feeling. What the mind makes of it, you can honestly forget... Your mind will find countless Wenns and Abers. Not to annoy you, but because it can’t help you. It balances any experience with already experienced ones. However, since every encounter with another person is unique, this reconciliation does not benefit anybody, but rather hinders the free flow of love.

You do not meet anyone in life accidently. And at least people who leave a lasting impression you always meet for a good reason.

Letting go is damn heavy

Well, letting go is damn hard. But equally damn important. For if, for whatever reason, this mental connection does not benefit from a "normal" relationship, then it is still there and not purely "accidental". Both have something for the other, something essential, otherwise they would not have experienced this connection and encounter. It's always about healing. And out of all those encounters comes something great. If you manage to let go of everything, the relationship can be redefined on a different level. Maybe you are not made for a relationship but for being business partners, life partners or …It would be a bad joke if one could not manage to gratefully accept and live the potential that one has in common because of emotional obstacles.

I know from my own story that just releasing is very difficult. As I said, such profound connections happen very rarely. I know so many people who want to find their soul partners. And I know a person who has even met their dual-soul. The ultimate challenge for her and him. Because it is even more difficult to find a living relationship and let go of everything. I've seen it almost daily for almost five years and I just have to say: My goodness, I could not stand this.

So, but now I have philosophized enough. In any case, we had met again. After three years. And chattered as if not nearly a thousand days between our last conversation. Familiar, funny and in many ways exatly on the same level. I enjoyed it and was delighted to hear the twists and turns of his life. We acted like two good friends. When we said good-bye, this did not leave a bad taste, no pain. Very happy about that I cycled home.

When I met KrishnaMa this morning for meditation, of course I immediately asked her: "Honey, tell me, what did you do last night? I woke up shortly after 5 and I cried out my soul. That was not without any reason, wasn’t it? You did something, didn’t you?" With a mischievous grin she replied: "Well, you're the typical cover-up candidate. For three days I accepted that but yesterday I had to remove it. The lid had to go. "I could have started crying again, so grateful I was to her. Again a little further, again deeper into the shallows of my ego. Again a pain redeemed. Again a bit more freedom.

 I do not know what it means that I feel suddenly so free and easy ;-)

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